3:16 RULSZ!
by NotOracle
Summary: a wrestling fanfiction once lost to history is now back! There was never a part 2, sadly. Whatever happened to Oracle anyway? AUSTIN needs to do more STUNNERS


3:16 RULZS!  
by Oracle

All right reserve or I kick some asss!

round 1!

vince stands in the ring with a snug expresion on face and mircophone in hand. he speak.

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHA! HEELLO EVERYBODY!

I'M VINCE MC MAN... THE BIG GUY AT WWF, HELL I OWN THE OWN FUCKING THING!  
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!

NOW TO INTRO MY GAY LOVE...I MEAN MY GAY FRIEND... HE'S PATT PATTERSON!  
YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

patterson walk to ring. he take mike and speak.

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAADDDDIESSSS AND HANDSOME MAN EVERYWHERE! I AM PATT!

NOW LET;S GET DOWN TO THE RING!

OUR FIST MATCH IS HACKSAW DUGGEN VS. STEVE AUSTIN 3:16!

LETTTTTTTTTTTTT'S GET REDY TO RUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

vince boinked patt on the head.

SHUT UP YOU GAY IDOT! WATCH THE MATCH INSTEAD!

hacksaw walk to ring. he yells loudly at fans HHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

glass breks and AUSTIN walks to the ring! YYYYYYYYYYEAH! 3:16 RULES! 3:16 RULES! 3:16 RULES!

AUSTIN walk to ring and gives hacksaw the finger!

YEAH! KICK HIS ASS,AUSTIN!

hacksaw say HHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! util AUSTIN kicks his nads!

Tjhen AUSTIN kick him again and again and again!

Then AUSTIN smack him on the butt.

Then AUSTIN kills him.

DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN! vince scramed pissed as he punch patt into the blechers.

NEXT MATCH DAMMIT! vince scream!

yokoznuna waddles down to ring.

as he enter ring he lift leg and farts real smeely. OOPSY! THAT ME! yoko screech

AUsTIN near pass out but he toughest SOB IN IN THE WWF!

AUSTIN ready to kick ass and chew bubbles and ass hard to chew! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!

(note: if you saw they live with roody piper you will get that joke)

AUSTIN ready to fight.

yoko with a big leg.

AUSTIN laughs and rips leg out. beats yoko with his leg.

yoko scream for help!

HAHAHAAH say AUSTIN you ass is mine!

yoko tries to get up on his other leg, hopping up and down.

AUSTIN laughs at how stupid yoko look.

yoko still hoping, starts to cry.

AUSTIN kicks yoko ass and stoomp a mudhole in his ass and laugh at his ass.

SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT! vince screech.

NEXT MATCH! send someone that doent SUCK!

mankind walk to ring. he pull out hair and screech.

HAHAHAHAHAH! THIS IS A HELL IN THE CELL MATCH! HAHAHAHAAHAHA! vince laugh.

as cell lowers mankind grab chair from ring and get in ring and the bell ring.

he hit AUSTIN with chair. AUSTIN fall down.

AUSTIN gets back up. AUSTIN kick mankind in nads repeat.

madkind uses madandable claw on AUSTIN. AUSTIN fights to get out of it. the crowd goes wild! then with strength, AUSTIN breaks free! YESSSSSSSSS!

AUSTIN throws mankind over ring into the CELL! AUSTIN picks up mankind and throws him into the cell.

AUSTIN picks up mankind and tries to piledrive him on steps.

mankind reverses and backdorps AUSTIN onto hard floor. OH NO!

mankind squeels like pig and runs into AUSTIN with his crotch.

Then he grabs AUSTIN head and ram back of it repately into post. (if you saw match with shawn micehals and crush at king of the ring 93, you know what i mean.)

then AUSTIN makes come back kicks mankind's ass.

mankind tries mandable claw again by sneaking on him but AUSTIN catch him and kick him in nads.

mankind screechs so AUSTIN kick him again.

suddenly mankind dropkick mankind into cell. AUSTIN falls on face. HAVE NICE DAY! mankind screech.

then mankind climbs inside of cell to the top and hangs from cieling.

then Mankind lets go of cell and drops towards AUSTIN!1111

SWACK!

AUSTIN had put his knee up in time and caught mankind coming down.

mankind screeches in pain as AUSTIN kicks him in shin. then AUSTIN gets up and throws mankind\\  
into ring.

mankind tries to run but AUSTIN catch him and gives him THE STUNNER! YES!

AUSTIN covers mankind.

1...2... NO! he's up!

AUSTIN picks up mankind and stuns him again!

he covers mankind.

1...2...3! AUSTIN win!

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK! vince screeched.

NEXT MATCH! THIS IS HELL IN CELL TOO!1

hulk hogan walk to ring. eric bitchoff gives hogan kiss but hogan laughs as he enter ring.

AUSTIN runs over to hogan and kicks him in nads.

AUSTIN stomps nads over and over.

nwo rushes into arena to save hogan's ass.

kevin nash rips cell door off hinges and tries to kill AUSTIN. AUSTIN kicks nash's knee, break it.

scott hall stumbles into ring and tried to closeline AUSTIN but AUSTIN duck and closeline him instead.

Syxx try to kick AUSTIN next. YOUR SUPPOSED TO BE IN WWF IDOT! oops sory syxxx says as he leaves.

mr. perfect tried to hit AUSTIN but AUSTIN hit him instead and he flip out of ring.

kevin nash trys to get up pissed as hell but AUSTIN kicks him in nads and throw him into cell wall.

scott trys to get up but keeps falling over as eric bitchoff charges AUSTIN.

AUSTIN grabs eric and give him the stunner. then he kicks him over and over in the nads.

vince laughs hard as his enemy gets his ass kicked.

then AUSTIN gives everybody a stunner and they run.

nash is still out cold on floor.

vince then screeches NEXT MATCH!

THIS IS A CACKET MATCH!

undertaker walk to ring. he raises arms and lights go on. he drags finger acros throat.

AUSTIN attacks him.

undertaker kicks AUSTIN in the nads then closeline him over ropes to the floor.

undertaker bounces ropes and leaps over ropes to closeline AUSTIN!1 OH MY GOD!11

undertaker chokes AUSTIN and throws him in cell. then undertaker picks up AUSTIN and trys to piledrive him on the steps! but AUSTIN reverses! YES!1

AUSTIN stomps a myhole in undertakers ass and walk it dry.

then AUSTIN throw undertaker through door that kevin nash broke.\

they take it outside.

undertaker kicks AUSTIN in the nads and throws him in the cell. then again.  
then undertaker climbs the outside of the cell.

AUSTIN follows and they start fighting on the cell!

undertakers take control and chockslam AUSTIN on ceiling.

the cell starts to break as undertaker trys to do it again

but AUSTIN kicks him in nads and throws him off cell. undertaker smashes through jim ross annouce table and dies.

YESSSSSSSS! AUSTIN climbs back down cell and vince is PISSED.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! you die now AUSTIN!

NEXT MATCH! FINAL FOUR MATCH!

(like the one in in your house with AUSTIN, brett hart, undertaker and vader)  
the rock owen hart and mark herny walk to ring.

they enter ring and triple team AUSTIN

owen kicks AUSTIN in the head

and mark herny gives him a big splash.

the rock gives AUSTIN a shouderbreaker and then takes his elbow off and gives the sign for the dreaded PEOPLE ELBOW! UH OH!

the rock bounces off the ropes and nails the elbow.

Then AUSTIN gets up and kicks the rock in the nads laughing at him for such using a lame move.

owen catch AUSTIN from behind with kick to the back of his head.

then mark herny splashes him again.

the fans hold up signs with AUSTIN 3:!6 RULES! and MARRY ME SABLE!

then the rock hits rock bottom on AUSTIN and goes for the pin! 1...2...no! he kicked out!

AUSTIN is pissed and kicking everybody assses.  
owen leaps off the top rope with a dropkick but hits mark herny instead! HAHAHAHAHAAHAAAH!

then AUSTIN gives all three stunners and pins them all!

AUSTIN WINS AGAIN! YESSSSSSSS!

DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAWN DAMN DAMN DAMN!

i'm not through yet! NEXT MATCH! AUSTIN VS. DX!

shawn michaels HHH x-pac and new age outlaws walk to ring. chyna is behind them.

they enter the ring and start attacking AUSTIN. AUSTIN grab HHH nose and rip it off and hit chyna with it. HAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAH!

then AUSTIN does a hurricaranna on x-pac!

the new age outlaws grabed AUSTIN and beat him up before AUSTIN stunned em both! YES! shawn tries superkkick but AUSTIN grab leg and break it.

then he stuns shawn.

HAHHAHAAH! TAKE THAT LOOSER! HAHAHAHAHAA!

vince was beyond piss, he screech NEXT MATCH! GRUDUGE MATCH!

brett hart walk to ring.

he grab mike and screech I BEST THEIR IS BEST THEIR WAS BEST THEIR EVER WILL BE!

AUSTIN tells brett to suck it and they fight.

brett punch AUSTIN in head and does toe drop. AUSTIN yell in pain as brett hamerlocks him. then AUSTIN revrses and throw brett into cell. brett land on kevin nash and wake him up consous.

kevin get up and charge ring.

AUSTIN trade blow with kevin nash and brett goes to top rope. brett trys to elbow AUSTIN but hit kevin nash instead.

kevin nash fall down to floor out cold again. HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH!

AUSTIN start beating up brett but brett kicks AUSTIN in nads.

then brett wrap AUSTIN leg around ring post in figuire 4! OH MY GOD!

AUSTIN screech but he not give up. brett use more presure but AUSTIN too tough for him.

brettt give up and drag AUSTIN back in ring.

brett stomp AUSTIN and does legg sweepy thing.

brett covers AUSTIN!

1...2...no!

AUSTIN kick out.

brett give AUSTIN backbreker then go to 2nd rope and nails elbow!

1...2...no1

AUSTIN kick out again!

brett is pissed and does his finsher move THE DREEDED SHARPSHOTER!  
NOOOOOOOOOO!

AUSTIN SCREECH AS BRETT LOCKS HIM UP, AUSTIN WONT GIVE UP! LET HIM GO!

the crowd screech. suddenly kevin nash wake up again and enter ring.

he kick brett for hitting him

and then set up AUSTIN for jacknife. suddenly AUSTIN backdrop kevin nash! YESS~!

brett closeline nash out of ring for hitting him

then AUSTIN catch brett from behind for stunner. 1...2...3!111 AUSTIN WINS!

kevin nash trys to get up again but brett kick him in nads as he leave.

HHAHAAHAAHAHHAAHAA! THAT IT! THAT FUCKING IT! FINAL MATCH! vince srceech.

AUSTIN VS...

VINCE MCMAN!

vince walk to ring. THIS IS THE MOMENT EVERBODY WAIT FOR!

THE BOSS VS. 3:16!\\!

vince punches AUSTIN. AUSTIN grabs vince and punches him over and over and over and over and over.

then he stomps a mudhole in his ass and kicks him in the nads over and over and over and over.

then AUSTIN picks up vince and give him tombstone on steps.

(the same one undertaker did in match with the fake undertaker\\\) then AUSTIN did it again. and again. and again. and again.

finally vince bleed hard from head.

PLESE! DONT KILL ME! vince screech

AUSTIN laugh and kick him in nads and then gives him the stone cold stunner.

vince fall and die.

AUSTIN WINS! AUSTIN WINS! AUSTIN WINS!

SHUP UP ROSS! AUSTIN screech as he kick jim ross in the nads.

THE END!

FOR NOW!

round 2 coming soon! watch it!  
Oracle 


End file.
